Five Things I Find Attractive in a Spouse

Today I saw a survey by Huffington Post weddings entitled ‘5 things I find attractive in a spouse’. I was intrigued by the 25 responses that were shown, notably 24 from women. No analysis was presented, so I thought I would give you my take on it. Not everyone answered the question or gave 5 things, but those who did, here is a summary:

First place went to physical attributes (a combination of eyes, teeth, hands, smile and the most popular – butt) with18 votes.

Second place is a sense of humour (humour) with 10 votes.

Third place is unconditional love/loving with 8 votes.

A surprising fourth place went to Intelligence with 7 votes.

And tied in fifth place is father of child/parenting skills and kindness/caring with 6 votes.

What was interesting to me was that the old-fashioned traits of honour, respect, hard work, generosity, sincerity just managed to scrape one vote each.

We spend so much time trying to ‘change’ our partners because they don’t match up to our expectations (heart breaker #6), they don’t ‘perform’ the way we expect them to, or we want them to treat us differently in some way. Yet when it comes down to it, apart most of the things we love about our spouses are born into them, and no amount of nagging is going to get an uncaring person to become caring or loving!

My take on it then is that if you have found someone who:

has a sense of humour

is smart

unconditionally loves you,

is kind and caring,

and has a great butt then you’re probably onto a pretty good thing!

Author and experienced relationship coach, Gillian Andale is the owner of Love2Last, a coaching and resource centre dedicated to couples who have found love again, want a new beginning and aim to strengthen and grow their relationship as well as need help in blended family situations.  Visit www.love2last.co to browse and see the wealth of information available.

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